Friday, September 17, 2010

LEAD ME... (wife posting)

(song can be played in our music selection)

Sanctus Real - “Lead Me”

I look around and see my wonderful life
Almost perfect from the outside
In picture frames I see my beautiful wife
Always smiling
But on the inside, I can hear her saying...

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes
They're just children from the outside
I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine
They're in independent
But on the inside, I can hear them saying...

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, but what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh, Father, show me the way
To lead them
Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love,
Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

____________________________________________________________________

It's been a rough couple of months at our house, we haven't had anything major happen, it is just the little stuff (and in the end the 'little stuff' amounts to the 'BIG STUFF'). We are struggling with staying on top of the daily things we need to be doing (both my husband and I) to keep these addictions from destroying our family. My husband is not acting out or participating in his addictions, but recovering from addictions takes daily effort for both spouses.

We have several friends going through this same trial. Watching the pain and agony that addictions are causing in their lives is breaking my heart! I HATE ADDICTION!!! I HATE that friends and family of mine have also experienced this heartache, some to a much deeper more destructive level than I have personally experienced. Lately, to me it seems like most marriages that end in divorce are mainly because of a spouse being caught in the traps of addiction. Pornography (and other addictions) are LITERALLY the plague of this generation! I wish there was something I could do, but I really don't know what! This is such a shameful disease that it is rarely openly talked about. I don't think it is appropriate to go announcing to the world your problems, but if we don't start talking about this the problem is only going to escalate! I know how alone this disease can make you feel, I have been there and I truly want others to know that they are NOT ALONE!

This past week in a business class of mine at school we were studying a chapter on Communication. As we were discussing this chapter this quote really stood out in my mind...

"You must love yourself and who you are first before you can effectively love and help others."

I KNOW for a fact that I will never have every aspect of my life 100% in order, but what I do know is that if I TRULY want to help others and be an instrument in the Lords hands then I have to stop being so stubburn and fully put MY LIFE in his hands!

1 comment:

  1. what an amazing wife I have! I don't know how I got so lucky but I do know that without you I wouldn't be the man I am, or striving to become the man I need to be.
    Thank you for all you do and are.

    ReplyDelete